I hate Christmas.
I think the fact that I’ve been working on this blog post for over two weeks is a pretty good indication that it’s hard to explain.
It’s not that I don’t appreciate the beauty of a Christmas tree, or a Christmas truck. And chestnuts roasting and mulled wine, hot apple cider, and the lights! Only a grumpy grinch wouldn’t like the lights. And here in New Mexico we have luminarias (or farolitos as they say in Santa Fe). And we have tamales and posole and biscochitos and snowy mountain tops. What’s not to love?
I used to say that Christmas reminded me of when my mom died, a memory brought back when I found a photo of that Christmas, my mom so thin and weak on a chaise lounge in the family room while my sister and I hung ornaments on the tree with pretend smiles to show that everything was fine. It wasn’t fine.
I’ve had so many more Christmases since then. Even lots of fun ones, incredible ones actually. Christmases with good friends and family, Christmases in Las Vegas (well, one that included a pink jeep tour and shows, so many shows), Christmases in Hawaii (too many to count) housesitting for friends on the beach (literally, steps from the water), in California with family, and a couple Christmases here in New Mexico. Christmases have been good.
It’s the pressure I hate. Pressure to buy gifts, pressure make everything perfect, to create, to re-create something that never was on one specific date. To be happy on one specific date. Why can’t we have a family get-together in March? I hate the expectations to buy gifts, to pretend everything is fine, even when it’s not fine.
As a writer it’s hard to get any work done over the holidays. I need down time, thinking time, not to mention actual writing time. All the togetherness wears on me. I need time without someone asking “what are you working on” every hour on the hour or assuming that even though my fingers are flying over the keyboard I’m not doing anything so I’m available to go shop or pick shells on the beach…. that I should be doing something.
I’ve devised a few strategies over the years.
Tips for Writing During the Holidays When Lots of Distractions People Are Around
ALONE TIME
If you’re like me you need time to scribble on the page, jot notes, or even do some reading. And if you’re like me, you have to learn to ask for it, to say “I need to spend some time alone.” This keeps me from being annoyed at everyone. Even if it’s just a little bit every day. Jill Badonsky, in her book The Nine Modern Day Muses describes a muse named Marge who is very practical and suggests just 10 minutes a day.
COFFEE SHOP WRITING
I had to train myself to work in coffee shops. Sometimes it’s noisy, the chairs aren’t comfortable, it’s not ergonomically set up. So I practiced. Now I take earbuds with me and have a couple of playlists set up for writing. And I’ve learned to be a little uncomfortable and write anyway. I find it’s a great way to get away from the distractions and at least get some work done. Set a goal to write a paragraph, to write for 5 minutes, or 10 minutes, or if you’re lucky and hour! (I tend to set a goal low so I can easily exceed my own expectation). Somehow going for coffee feels more legit than just staring at your computer in front of the whole family.
SCHEDULE
Be sure you know the schedule. Know when you’re expected to be ready to go somewhere, or be at the dining room table, or help out in the kitchen. This is especially crucial so you know when you can ask for alone time or go for coffee.
YOUR TIPS?
How do you maintain your sanity writing schedule during the holidays? Please share your tips!
luminaria photo credit: Attribution: Camerafiend at English Wikipedia